On social media I've been sharing music from my records with a few words about them. The last song from my debut EP 85th and Nowhere (2005) I wanted to say more about than I could in a FB post as I recently found out the person I wrote the song with died in a freak accident. It happened three years ago but we had lost touch and I never knew until I few weeks ago. I stopped in Tampa and my first order of business was to find the guy I wrote 1,000 Kisses with. So I did the 2015 thing and looked for him on Facebook but to no avail. So I Googled him. My body went cold and the room started spinning when I read that he was gone and had been for some time. Funny that Jeremy Rowland often used the expression "a day late and a dollar short. " And that I was.
The idea for the song came to me while listening to The Bee Gee's "More Than a Woman." The idea of loving someone so much and being so connected that if you met again in "a thousand years" you would be certain you would fall in love with them again. And that's how I felt about someone at the time I wrote so it is what I wrote about.
Jeremy was my first friend in Tampa. I had gone to Florida after a long stint in NYC. I had something I needed to do that took longer than anticipated. And when one day I saw an ad in Creative Loafing for an Elvis Costello Tribute show I knew I would be happy here for a while and so decided to make my mark in music starting in Tampa, Fl. It was no NYC and I for one was glad about that. Later I would go on to play WMNF 88.5 Tampa's shows with my own bands that Jeremy was also a part of and to NYC to play shows where I became a part of what is left of the city's underground (stories for another day.) I have the luxury of a home there without the cost of having a home there. Now, many cities later, I live in Portland, OR. But I am travelling at the moment and find myself back in my musical city by the bay.
The night of the Costello show I met what would become my muse for 85th. I remember the red and white checkered baby doll dress I wore and how it seems the heaven's had opened up. I remember the shoes I wore along with the courage to walk up and say "Hello."
Everything in life seemed so perfect. I knew I needed to be there in that time and place so I eventually took an apartment and across the way lived Jeremy. We began to hang out and I trusted him to tell him about my visions. Being a prolific songwriter he offered to help the new kid though I was older than he was.
Jeremy had a significant wild streak. Sometimes I would see him through his curtain-less windows mad from booze. Once the happy buzz phase had passed he would go into violent rages absolutely destroying his apartment. At first it scared me. After a while I would just turn out the lights and go to bed. I would often go over the next day to help him clean up his mess but I was only able to clean up his broken things and not whatever it was that was destroying him. That said, I think I was good for him to be around. He liked working with me and I was a calming force in a crazy world where I could only see the symptoms and not the cause. But I think the writing , and eventually playing with me. soothed him as well as having a friend who was easy and determined.
A southern boy from Savannah he had a leaning towards alt- country. I did not. Once he said I should move to Nashville and pursue a career as an alt-country musician. Though years later I did move to Nashville I shot that genre down instantly! I I was capable of it but totally disinterested. I said I would be building a life of pretense if I did that and I was unwilling. I knew what I wanted to do. I just wasn't sure at the time how to get there and so he obliged and got to know me as an artist so he could help me do what I envisioned. Luckily he was well versed in all music. Prior to writing 1,000 Kisses, which clearly has country influences due to my relationship with him, we put together a demo called Sugarcoated. It had the song Pretty which ended up on 85th, Best Not to and Last Rose of Summer. I have performed both live but never fully produced them. Sugarcoated was just myself singing and Jeremy on guitar. Still, it got airplay. I had never had airplay before. I was over the moon about it.
I loved making a "record." I loved being in the studio. I loved doing the artwork and taking pictures for the sleeve. I loved handing it out to people and by doing so I gained media attention but also the attention of other writers and musicians I would later go on to work with. And, that lead to shows and all of the rest. The cover was of a drawing my grandfather had done. We suspect it was inspired by my mom as it does quite look like how he did when she was young.
Along the way Jeremy and I had a falling out. What I know is that a musician he looked up to really got in his head about me in part because he wanted Jeremy to be in his band and not mine. He said terrible things about me and I know what they were because Jeremy was repeating them word for word as if a record and it wasn't the Jeremy I knew. The thing that was "terrible" about me was that I worked hard and I wasn't a dick. A small few did not like that and I knew it. The rest rewarded me for it to include the now owner of The Hub offering to fund 85th when he heard I was making a record. Realize I was always the new girl no matter how much I was a part of things. The Hub was THE place to be. That was the in crowd. It was probably a kick in the teeth to a few that I would get so much support when I had come out of nowhere in their eyes. They did not know the prep time that went into what I was currently doing. Takes a lot to change a life to live your dreams and I assuredly had my obstacles to getting there.
In the end Jeremy and I made up and it was one of the most beautiful days of my life. The truth always prevails and at the bottom of all the nonsense there was a great love between Jeremy and I. I am sad he is gone. He would be really, really happy for me and would love to know he helped me get to the point where I stand today and for setting me up so I could work with John Ashton (The Psychedelic Furs) on my next record which is now in its infancy but not for long with everyone's support.
Weeks ago when I realized Jeremy had died (and not from booze, he had actually cleaned up his act and was helping his mom move when something fell on him and killed him if you can believe that) I walked around in a teary daze. I sat down at a bench and just stared off into space. At a certain point I looked over and saw a set of stairs. It took me a minute but I realized that that was where I took my first promotional shots. My friend Catherine took them. Nothing fancy about the shoot. And as I remember that night I scanned fast forward through all that had happened since that day around 12 or so years ago like one would look through a flip book. I remembered how happy I was and how everything was new and all looked bright. I thought about the accomplishments and adventures that followed but I also thought about the challenges and horror stories and realized that I was about to embark on the next big step. I somehow felt I owed it to Jeremy to make my next move, that I owed it to any of the many people I met along the way who gave up or who had also died. Being a musician means you will lose your friends. Its fucking awful. So I wrote to John Ashton and said "OK. I am ready. Let's do this.. Let's start" and I felt that great feeling all over again but with the knowledge of someone who was no longer a novice with a dream but someone who was still standing and doing so on her very own feet.
As I completed my thoughts of the past and started looking to the future a teenage boy walked up to those same set of steps with a professional photographer. What an oddity. There is nothing special about these steps. On my way out I walked up to him and told him how I took my first pictures there too. I told him he was about to have a grand adventure (I assume acting or modelling) and wished him the best.
Jeremy taught me something about songwriting that I use to this very day: "Have a great opening line and tell the whole story in the first set of lyrics." He taught me to grow a set and if I was going to do the work, if they were going to be my songs and if I was going to find myself as a band leader whether I wanted the job or not to put my name on it and wear it proudly. "Michele Ari" has never been about ego. Its just a vehicle to get out my ideas for anyone who cares to hear and the band has to be called something. I can always blame Jeremy for sticking me with my own damned name.
Incidentally, he is the only person with whom I show lyrics credit.
And so Jeremy I thank you wild man. When I meet you in a 1000 years from now I know I will fall in love with you again.
Pick up 1,000 Kisses here in my Store. 